Previously on Betsy’s Blog…
Harry, Betsy’s Quest Guide, is afraid Betsy has become derailed in her Quest to be a successful indie author. This fear appears justified when he finds her lying in a slovenly heap in the temporal lobe of her brain, drowning her grief and sorrow in a sea of sugars, fats, and chemicals. He tries to snap her out of it, and seems to be making good progress when suddenly another Voice speaks.
Who is this Voice? What does it want? Why didn’t Betsy know it was there? Why is Betsy’s mouth smeared with confectioner’s sugar? Join Betsy and Harry as they strive to find the answers to these important questions…
(and now, we resume Betsy’s and Harry’s conversation, already in progress…)
*Harry evades Betsy’s outstretched arms* Okay, so, first of all. Who else is in here?
*Betsy blinks* Who else? Nobody.
*Harry shakes his head* I know I heard somebody else in here.
*Betsy frowns* No. Seriously. It’s just me.
I don’t–
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*Betsy looks around her brain* Who’s that?
Who’s that? *Harry stares at her* It’s your brain. Don’t you know?
No. *Betsy considers* But the voice does sound strangely familiar.
OF COURSE MY VOICE IS FAMILIAR. YOU HAVE HEARD IT ALL OF YOUR LIFE.
Who are you? *Harry stands on his back legs, hands on hips* And why are you shouting?
Oops. Sorry. I am so powerful that I forget to tone it down sometimes.
Powerful? *Betsy frowns* How can you be powerful when you’re in my brain and I don’t even know you?
I thought we covered that. You know me.
Okay. *Betsy stands, dislodging Harry* I said your voice was familiar, but I have no idea who you are.
Well, I do hide. I kind of…lurk. Then I…nudge.
*Harry looks at Betsy* Nudge?
This way or that. *Voice sounds amused* Hither and yon.
*Betsy crosses arms* I’m not sure I like the idea of being nudged.
I would imagine you don’t. You normally hate me when you’re in your right mind. *giggles* But it so easy to get you out of your right mind. When you’re in your WRONG mind you do whatever I say.
*Betsy bites her lip* Harry? Harry, I’m scared.
*Harry stares up at her* I’m a freaking gerbil here. What the hell am I supposed to do?
*Betsy stamps her foot* You’re my Quest Guide, aren’t you? I think this is one of those obstacles you’re supposed to Guide me around or something.
Oh. Yeah. Right. *Harry clears his throat* Okay, so what the heck are you anyway, Voice?
What am I? I don’t know. *Sounds dreamy* Addiction. Compulsion.
Addiction? *Betsy’s voice squeaks* Like…like… food addiction?
Remember how you created “butter balls” when you were young?
*Harry looks at Betsy* Butter balls? What the heck are “Butter balls” Although, frankly, I’m not sure I want to know.
*Betsy gets a far-away look on her face* Ohhhh….White bread. Margerine. Squished in my fist. Margerine between my fingers. Sometimes, if I could sneak it, I used confectioners sugar. Mmmmm…
Okay, not exactly what I was picturing, but it sounds disgusting. *Harry shrugs* So, what did you have to do with all that, Voice?
Who do you think gave her the idea? And kept her at it? Then there were the pints of ice cream she sneaked into–
Stop! *Betsy holds up her hand* *Blushes* Not in front of Harry.
*Voice laughs nastily*
*Harry puffs up his little body to try to look bigger* So, what’s all this about, Voice? This just a trip down memory lane or something?
No, my little Guide. This was a demonstration.
Demonstration? *Betsy looks around nervously* Demonstration of what?
You think you want to move forward? You think you want to get out of your rut? Well, I like your rut just fine the way it is.
*Harry struts forward* Oh, yeah? She’s got a Guide now, buddy.
Yes, she has a Guide. And the first time tragedy struck, she turned to me. Just like she always does.
I wasn’t thinking right! *Betsy wipes away tears* Don’t you take my sweet Emily and my sweet Oliver and make them something you can use! Don’t you do that!
I already did. I sang to you of their loss, and you turned to me. You followed my Voice. Like always.
I didn’t know! *Betsy stands defiant*
You knew.
Well, I sure as hell didn’t know. *Harry runs up Betsy’s side and perches on her shoulder* And now we both do. Now I know I need to watch out.
You may see me….you may not. I swim through this brain and sing my songs. Night and day, I am the one…
This is MY brain. *Betsy fists her hands on her hips* This is MY BRAIN! And you are not welcome here, Voice!
You’re going to throw me out? Well, you can try. I’ll just come back later.
Get out. Get out now!
Are you sure?
GET OUT! *Betsy and Harry scream it together.
Very well. See ya….or not.
*silence*
*Betsy pants* *Looks at Harry perched on shoulder* I’m sorry.
*Harry pats her cheek with a paw* It’s okay, doll. We both know what we’re up against now.
Do we? *Betsy chews on her lip* I’m not sure.
Well, regardless of this Voice thing, you know that you need to start writing again. Right? *Harry glares at her sternly*
Yes. *Betsy nods* Looks down* And the Voice was right. I guess I knew I was making excuses to eat and not do my work.
You’re only human, doll. But let’s get going.
Can I shower first? The sugar I have sticking all over my body is icky. And I might attract ants.
Of course. *Harry jumps down to the floor* And I’ll get the Muse propped up with a cup of coffee.
*Betsy nods* Sounds like a plan. *Smiles* Thanks for coming to get me.
Any time, kiddo.
But is that the end? Has the Voice gone for good? Has Betsy thrown it out of her brain? Only time will tell…
To be continued…
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