Betsy Horvath

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  • Go With The Flow

    The other day, two of my characters decided to um, get busy with each other.

    I’m a romance author. Characters tend to get busy (*wink, wink*) in romance novels. But here’s the thing. I hadn’t planned for this to happen in the scene I was writing. I hadn’t really wanted it to happen in this particular scene. A little later on, yes. But not now. And yet I looked up from my typing and the heroine was sitting in the hero’s lap playing tonsil hockey.

    I realized that I had a choice. I could force the characters apart, send them each to their respective corners, as it were, and bend them to my will. Or I could go with the flow.

    I decided to just go with it. The result was a scene that was incredibly easy to write. Everything just fell into place (pardon the pun). More, I realized that what had happened made sense for the story, more sense than what I had planned. Their love scene spun out organically from the situation, which is important and sometimes a little difficult to pull off.

    What happened? The characters took over. They turned the tables and made me do what they wanted to do. As a result, they came alive.

    It’s not always convenient when the characters take over. The fact that the scene is different than I’d intended screws up my story outline. And because it’s not convenient, it’s very tempting for the author to push the characters back where we want them to go. Lord knows I’ve fallen into that trap. The result is stilted dialog and fake action.

    I don’t know if this scene will stay in the book. I’m sure it will need to be rewritten and edited in the second draft. But I’m glad that I’ve matured enough as an author to recognize what was happening. I’m glad I went with the flow of the story, despite my intentions.

    I hope that at some point I’ll be mature enough as a human being to treat other humans the same way that I treat my characters. I hope that eventually I’ll learn not to try to push people into boxes. I hope I won’t try to make other people follow my outline. I hope I can let them be who they are, the same way I’m learning to let my characters be who they are.

    It’s just a lot easier to do in fiction.

     

  • Fashion Changes

    I was in the cafeteria at work the other day thinking about how much workplace fashions have changed since I was a shiny new worker-bee Betsy.

    For example, I was working at a bank when casual Fridays came into vogue. In fact, they had been all the rage in other industries for several years (banks are notorious late adopters of fashion trends). It was a HUGE deal when this bank decided to prove how progressive it was by adopting casual Fridays. They printed a multi-page pamphlet and distributed it to all employees giving guidelines of what was appropriate casual wear, and what was not. If we had any questions, we were supposed to contact our supervisor for guidance.

    I’m not kidding. I wish I had saved the pamphlet.

    I can just imagine my supervisor’s face if I had called him at 7:00 in the morning to ask if my casual day attire was appropriate.  “But my biker shorts are purple…are they okay?”

    I don’t work in banking anymore. At my current employer, quite a few people wear jeans or cords every day of the week. And during the summer flip-flops are everywhere in our office – for men and women (although I wish the men would shave their hairy toes before they wear them).

    I also remember a day when I was only a few years out of high school. I was talking to my supervisor at at one of my first jobs – an older woman who basically ran the office. I don’t know how it came up, but she said (and this is pretty much a direct quote) “I think it should be illegal for women to wear pants to work.”

    Well, okay then.

    Today I often see young (and some not-so-young) women wearing skirts or dresses that hit them mid-thigh or higher at work. Sometimes the dress or skirt just barely covers their butt. One day I followed a young woman who was wearing a light pink sweater dress so short that she had to constantly tug it down as she walked. I believe I saw not only the color, but the style of her underwear, which was really more information that I cared to receive. (although if she hadn’t been wearing any underwear, that REALLY would have been TMI)

    I laughed when I thought about my old supervisor and her edict against pants. I’m not quite sure this was what she had in mind.

    And the moral of the story? You should always be careful what you ask for. You just might get it.

    And if you’re going to wear a short skirt to work, you should always wear underwear.

     

  • Shaking the Piggy Bank

    Every year I fall into the “goals” trap. I think it’s because the shiny new year stretches before me and makes me think anything is possible. This year I have goals in two primary areas – writing and getting out of debt.

    The writing goals are important and I’ve talked about them before. But the “getting out of debt” goals might be even more urgent.

    If I could go back to the Betsy of 30 years ago, I would tell her not to get into debt in the first place. I would tell her to do without rather than charging stuff. I would tell her that the stuff she charges isn’t going to be worth a flea’s sigh in a couple of years anyway. I would tell her to save money for things. I would tell her that debt is like a bad marriage that never ends. I would tell her that debt is a way of selling yourself into slavery, that it’s a huge rock you have to carry around, that it just gets heavier and heavier as time goes on.

    I know sometimes you have to go into debt – there are all sorts of valid reasons why you would. I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about unsecured debt. Credit card debt. I’m talking about “I need it NOW” debt. That’s the debt that’s killing me. I think you sell yourself down the river most of the time, not by having a massive emergency, but because you can’t control yourself when you’re at the Target. Or on Amazon. Or at the grocery store.

    So, 2012 is the year I begin getting out of debt. Again. I’ve tried before, but I’m really determined this time. I’m not getting any younger, and I don’t like the fact that the massive amount of debt I’m carrying keeps me from having the freedom to do things I’d like to do. Instead I must slave for the bill payments. And then I get discouraged and go shopping and add to them.

    No more.

    And thus, my friends, I have developed a strange and frightening thing. It is called a “Bud-get”. Huh. A budget. A plan for my money for the month. Look at that. *pokes budget*

    Do you hear that sound? That’s the sound of pennies squealing as they are pinched. Feel that moisture? That’s from juice being wringed out of dollar bills. Sense the uncertainty? That’s me saying – “Can I Do It? Well, CAN I?”

    Yes, I can.

    I just don’t want to.

    Because the thing about budgeting is you realize how much money you really have. And it’s not nearly as much as what you THINK you have.

    I like it better when I think I have more money, not less.

    But I’m going to do it. I won’t be out of debt this year but I’m going to get a good start on it.

    You might want to wish me just a wee bit of luck. ‘Cause baby, I’m going to need it.

     

  • Looking Forward to Surprises


     
    2011 was a year of “firsts” for me. My first book published. My first time working with a real, live editor. My first good book review. My first bad book review. My first RWA National Conference. My first time at Times Square. My first time at the Waldorf Astoria. My first blog post. My first Twitter tweet. My first time doing a blog tour. My first time trying to promote something I’d written. Add in all of the brilliant authors, editors, bloggers and readers I’ve met and talked with over the past year? Just. Awesome.

    And now it’s over.

    **sigh**

    Well, I mean the book is still out there and going strong, obviously. But all of those “firsts” are finished.

    Fortunately there will be other “firsts”, and I can’t wait to see what 2012 brings. Or rather, I can’t wait to see what I bring out of 2012. Because you know, the course of the year may twist and turn, but what I get out of it is going to be up to me.

    At the moment the year is stretching out in front of me all shiny and new, filled with possibility. It’s like a pure white snow upon which no one has trod. I haven’t had time to screw it up yet. I haven’t had time to disappointment myself yet. I haven’t had time to fall short of my goals yet. I look, and I am determined. It is, after all, just the first day.

    I don’t have a crystal ball. I don’t know what 2012 will bring. I hope for good things, but I guess some things will happen that I consider bad. All I know for certain about this year is that it will be nothing like what I expected. It will be surprise after surprise. Because life is unexpected. And life is surprising.

    Happy New Year, my friends. And may our 2012 be filled with good “firsts” and good surprises.

     

  • Some Fun Facts About Colds

    I often ponder what I should write on my blog. But then I figure I should just tell you what I’m thinking about at the time. Because, hey. I’ve really got nothing else to write about.

    This week I’ve been thinking about colds. Head colds. Well, really head colds that settle in your throat and make you feel like you are being stabbed with hot pokers, to be precise.  I really am feeling better now than I was earlier in the week, but since colds are what I’ve been thinking about I thought I would share with you.  And so, here are some fun facts about the common cold.

    What is a “cold” anyway?

    The common cold is a viral infectious disease that infects the upper respiratory system. It is also known as acute viral rhinopharyngitis, or acute coryza. So there.

    Can I catch a cold by going out in the cold?

    Experts say that going out when it is cold does not have any effect on the risk of catching a cold or spreading one. Sometimes when I have a cold, I intentionally go outside because I figure the cold might kill the germs. But that’s just me. I’m a little unusual.

    Well, okay then. What causes a cold?

    The common cold can be caused by more than 200 different viruses. Up to 50% of colds are caused by rhinoviruses.  As opposed to rhinoceroses.

    Why do we cough?

    Duh, so we can get the attention of sales clerks talking on their cell phones when we want to pay and get out of the store.  And we cough to clear our airways (lungs, throat, etc). Sometimes we cough because of irritations to our airways – either an inhaled irritant (like smoke) or due to an infection of the upper airways. Sometimes we cough because we feel like we have hot pokers being stabbed into our voice box.

    Why do our noses run?

    Because they can’t walk! HAH! I SLAY me! No, no. Viruses, like our friend the cold virus, get in there and attack the mucus membranes, causing extra watering and mucus production. Trust me on this one.

    Ew. Mucus. What is Mucus?

    Mucus is a slippery, slightly sticky fluid produced by membranes in the mouth, nose, throat and naughty bits. The mucus membrane traps anything inhaled…like viruses. And then it’s all over but the shouting. Or coughing.

    And what should I do for a cold?

    Gargle with salt water. Because my mother says to. And because it really does help. It kind of pickles your throat and kills the nasty little virus germies. And eat chicken soup. Because you just should, that’s all. Unless you’re vegetarian. Then you should eat vegetable soup. Which is what I’m going to do right now.

     

     

    References:
    http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/166606.php
    http://www.drreddy.com/rhinitis.html
    http://www.ivillage.com/why-does-gargling-salt-water-help-your-throat/4-n-142239
    http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2007/jan/10/chicken_soup_common_cold/

  • Wisdom from Charles

    Thanks to a wicked Christmas cold attacking my throat and some rather stringent demands from my day job attacking my sanity, I don’t have many creative brain cells left to come up with a blog post today. So I’ve decided to share with you some wit and wisdom from Charles – Charles Dickens, that is.  Here are a few of my favorite quotes from this great novelist:

    “I admire machinery as much as any man, and am as thankful to it as any man can be for what it does for us.  But, it will never be a substitute for the face of a man, with his soul in it, encouraging another man to be brave and true. ”

    The Wreck of the Golden Mary

    You can encourage people through an email, but you need to be with them to hold on tight.

    “I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round…as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys.”

    A Christmas Carol

    Just remember – we are all pink on the inside. And the fact that you can afford a great funeral for yourself won’t get you out of attending it.

    “No one is useless in this world…who lightens the burden of it to anyone else.”

    Our Mutual Friend

    It doesn’t matter what we do for a living. Our real job is to be a blessing to each other.

    “Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts.”

    Our Mutual Friend

    As we move into the brave New Year of 2012, this is my wish for all of you and for myself as well. May we have hearts that never harden, tempers that never tire, and touches that never hurt.

    Indeed.