Category: Health and Well-Being

When last we left Betsy, she was contemplating her three goals for 2012. They are:

1) stop eating sugar and get the diabetes under control
2) write every day
3) pay down that debt!

So, how am I doing?

I think I’m doing pretty well, although there’s definitely room for improvement.

1) stop eating sugar and get the diabetes under control

As noted in this blog post, I’ve been refined sugar free for a while now (107 days at the time of this writing). Being an addictive personality, I turned my affections to lightly salted mixed nuts and Amy’s organic pizza. I’ve been pizza-free for 13 days now. I haven’t been as successful with the nuts, so that’s going to be an area of concentration for the next couple of weeks.

But the good news is that my diabetes numbers have improved dramatically. In January, my fasting blood sugar was around 250 – WAAAAYYY too high. Now I’m usually around 130. Still high, but much better. And my A1c (the average blood sugar over the last three months) dropped from a 10 (indicating an average of around 260) to 6.6 (indicating an average of about 150). For you non-diabetics out there, the “normal” numbers are 90-100 fasting blood sugar and under 6.0 for the A1c.

I’m especially glad that I was able to impact the numbers with diet and exercise, not medication. In fact, I had to reduce the prescribed medications I was taking because they were making my sugar go too low.

All in all, I have to say so far so good. The challenge will be maintaining now that I’ve had a more pleasant doctor’s visit.

2. Write every day

April and the beginning of May have been pretty stressful and really pulled me out of my routine. I managed to write almost every day, but my productivity decreased due to demands on my time, worry, and the need to escape from the reality of my life. Hello, SIMS!

That being said, the first draft of my next book is finished. I had trouble nailing the ending, but I’ve resolved those issues and am well under way with the second draft. I had hoped to have a submittable manuscript by the beginning of June, but I’m not going to make that date. Still, all is going well.

I’m a little afraid of my second draft. I’m afraid that I won’t be able to make it good. But the more I work with it, the more comfortable I’m becoming, and now that the family issues seem to have calmed down (for the moment), I hope to pick up the pace again.  The focus is just writing a good, enjoyable book.

3) Pay down the debt

This is the goal that suffered the most during the stress of April. I was very distracted and wasn’t paying as much attention as I should have when I shopped. Plus there were the days of pizza and nuts, and those things blew my food budget!

On the other hand, my step 1 “mini” emergency fund is fully funded. I have made some progress at paying down my debt, although not as much as I had hoped. It could be my hopes were a trifle unrealistic, but I shall persevere!

I’ll need to regroup on this goal and get back to a written budget.

 

So, there you are! A brief status update for those who care. We now return you to your regularly scheduled program… 😀

 

April was a very interesting month around the Palatial Horvath Estate. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. One thing I learned in April is that I’m still a compulsive overeater. I was not magically cured by three months of more sensible eating.

Go figure.

As of the time of writing this blog post, I am 95 days refined sugar free. And that’s awesome. Tracking it day by day has made a chain that’s saved me more than once. Because I don’t want to break the chain, and because I want to be able to mark one more day in my book, I’ve resisted the baked goods and the ice cream. I’ve also managed to stay away from sugar or sugar-like ingredients hidden in food. Go me!

But then there was April. Different things have happened. Mom’s needed much more care than usual so I’ve been running around with her and worrying about her. The job’s been demanding. People have been…people. I really want more time to write, so I’ve been stealing from my sleep time. In other words – stress. And I turned to find comfort where I’ve always found it. Food.

I didn’t eat any sugar, which was a major win for me. But a few days ago I finally realized that I have still been compulsively overeating. I just haven’t been eating sugar products. This time I’ve been compulsively overeating…nuts.

Doesn’t that sound dirty? Now how the hell am I going to explain that one? It’s bad enough to know that I’m addicted to sugar. How in the world am I supposed to say that I’m addicted to lightly salted mixed nuts without getting arrested for soliciting? Hey, they’re low in carbs, high in protien, right? Heart healthy. With enough fats to stop a truck.

I’ve also become addicted to Amy’s Natural Foods pizza, because that’s the only pizza I’ve been able to find that doesn’t contain sugar. If I rationalize it correctly, I can make the carbs in the pizza not seem so bad. And, hey, it doesn’t have sugar.

So that was my April. Pizza and nuts. Nuts and pizza.

On May 1, my blood sugar was higher than it had been since January. Being an intelligent person, that’s when I realized I’d fallen into old compulsions. And I threw away my nuts.

As if in gratitude, my blood sugar numbers have been almost normal since then.

I’m hoping that May will turn out to be a brand new day. A sugar – pizza – nut free day.

I wonder what I’ll compulsively overeat next? Carrots? Broccoli?

Nah.

 

As you may, or may not, know (or care), I’m in the throes of several “Betsy makeover” initiatives this year. With luck, they will help me release my inner Betsy.

Roar like a lioness, Betsy! Roar!

mewwwww!

Hey, it’s a start.

Since I have taken to spewing my personal angst all over cyberspace, I thought I would give you a brief update on how I’m doing as I work towards my three main goals.

Writing

This has been both the simplest and the most difficult of the three goals. It’s simple because my objectives are very clear. Here’s what I’m going to do: I’m going to write. When I finish my next book, I’m going to write another one. And so on. I want to write pretty much every day.

How am I doing? Well, I’m back in the saddle again after a brief hiatus to come to terms with some health issues. I’ve been working on my WIP pretty much every day for the last two weeks, and it is progressing nicely. And that makes me happy.

Rating: Good

Eating

My diabetes has been pretty bad (hence the health issues). To deal with it, I decided to radically change my eating habits. Here’s what I’ve been eating for the past three weeks: vegetables, legumes, some meat, some fruit, some grains. And when I get tired of that? I eat vegetables. And for fun? I eat vegetables.

How am I doing? Pretty well, actually. I find that I actually like the way I’m eating now. It makes me feel good. I have been refined and artificial sugar-free for 22 days (and 19 hours, but who’s counting) I’ve lost a little bit of weight. My sugar numbers are getting better. Progress on both of those fronts has been slow, but steady, and that’s encouraging. I figure the hard part will come after I see the doctor again in May, because I anticipate that visit will be much better than the last one. I’ll have to be careful that I don’t slack off after a better report.

Rating: Good

Spending

I’m working to pay off my debt and gain my financial freedom. I’ve pulled back on a lot of my spending and rearranged things like my cell phone to try to reduce monthly charges. This has freed up money that will be used to pay down the debt. Right now I’m funding a baby emergency fund. After that’s finished, I’ll take aim at the debt itself. To the moon!

How am I doing? Working on the spending at the same time that I’m working on the eating was a good choice, because I just don’t have the money to spend on food. I’m getting the budget rolling, and it’s starting to feel more natural. The next big step (after tax returns) is going to be finding things around the house to sell, and figuring out how to sell them.

Rating: Good

And the overall verdict? So far so good.

I’ll let you know how I’m doing periodically as the year progresses. Well, honestly I should say that I’ll let you know how I’m doing as long as I’m doing well. If I start to fade in any area I’ll probably just change the subject. *whistles casually*

But enough about me. I hope you guys are doing well in your own 2012 makeovers!

 

As part of my diabetic makeover, I’ve started walking regularly again.  This is good for me not only physically, but mentally. Walking seems to unclog my mind and gets the streams of thought and creativity flowing more freely. I’ve read somewhere that walking is called “meditation in motion”, and for me that is true.

Personally, I prefer not to listen to music while I walk. I also don’t usually walk with other people because they tend to want to talk. Or, my personality being what it is, I feel like I have to talk to them. When I’m walking, I want to think.

The other problem I have walking with other people is that almost everyone walks faster than I do. Left to my own devices, I stroll. In German, the word for “stroll” is “bummel“. Isn’t that great? I bummel around the walking trail and let people pass me by. Most of them look pretty intent on passing me.

Of course the issue with creativity flowing while you’re walking is that you’re usually pretty far from a computer. I can’t stand the sound of my own voice, so I don’t use a voice recorder (besides, that’s not the way I write). So I take a small notepad with me and write things down as I think of them. I try to keep walking at the same time that I’m writing, which can be interesting. I am not known for my grace. But so far not much damage has been done.

I don’t always work on my writing as I walk. Sometimes I plan my future. When I’m walking, I can make detailed plans to be the queen of the universe and they all seem possible. Sometimes I just think long thoughts. Sometimes I don’t think at all, as far as I can tell, but when I get back I find things I didn’t know were bothering me have worked themselves out. Sometimes walking is just an excuse to get away from my desk.

Comedian Steven Wright said that “everything is within walking distance, if you have the time.” And for me, what’s within walking distance is myself. It’s so easy to get trapped inside – in our houses, in our cubicles, in our minds. We need to get up, get out, and move around a little bit.

So, go on. Take a walk. Or better yet, just bummel. 🙂

 

Well, don’t I feel all dramatic after my last couple of blog posts? Sorry about that. I’ll just tell you that the doctor’s visit went pretty much as I feared and my diabetes is bad at the moment.

But I’ve decided that just because my diabetes is bad, and just because my debt is bad, doesn’t mean that I’m bad.  I’m feeling determined, and I’m taking steps down a healthier road. My debt makeover and my physical makeover mean this year is going to be fabulous. So there.

Of course, now that I’m feeling all determined and crap, I realized that it is a time of year which until now has been one of my favorites.  I’m referring to Girl Scout cookie season. When I was out and about yesterday, I saw the little pushers set up all over the place. I practically had to use ninja moves to extract myself from one bunch.

That experience, and an innocent Facebook post from a friend, inspired me to compose what I feel is one of my best poems yet: An Ode to Girl Scout Cookies.

Okay, here we go… *clears throat*

 

An Ode to Girl Scout Cookies

By Betsy Horvath

 

To me Thin Mints
Were simply keen
I’d sniff the packets
And start to dream.

 

The Carmel DeLights
Are sweet and chewy
One look at them
And I’d go gooey.

 

Peanut Butter Patties
With chocolate and nuts
For them I’d spend
A hundred bucks.

 

Then came the sandwiches
Also of Peanut Butter
While eating them,
There was no other.

 

Thanks-A-Lots, Shortbread,
Lem-on-ade Iced,
And don’t forget Shout-Outs
Geez, they’re nice.

 

No more Girl Scout Cookies
Will I ingest
Eat them before me
And I’ll smell your breath.

 

Now with that warning
Enjoy the season
And enjoy your cookies
(within reason).

 

Thank you.

 

As I was eating inappropriately for my diabetic condition to celebrate Thanksgiving, I realized something important about myself. In fact, I had what Bob Mayer would call a “moment of enlightenment”.

I have, as you may or may not know (or care), been trying to move forward in my life with varying degrees of success. After all, I’m more than half way through this thing now. I’d better get with the program if I’m going to actually be the kind of person I want to be, and achieve what I want to achieve. You only have so much time for do-overs before the referee blows the whistle and calls the game finished.

This weekend, in a moment of stunning clarity, I realized what has been keeping me from moving towards my goals. I realized why I hesitate to do the hard work. Are you ready? Here it is:

When it comes right down to it, all I REALLY want is to be able to do anything I want to do and have there be absolutely no consequences whatsoever.

I want to be able to eat anything I want to eat and never gain weight or have high blood sugar. I want to be able to buy whatever I want and yet still get out of debt. Better yet, I want to be able to buy whatever I want to buy and still have way more money than I can spend. I want to be able to play computer games or read or just loaf around the house eating bon-bons and still be a writer. I want to have as many books published as Nora Roberts, but I want them to magically appear on my computer.

In other words, I just want to be able to do what I want when I want and still have the results be what I want them to be. I want there to be no consequences. This has been my true overarching goal and I have worked diligently to achieve it for years. Is that so wrong?

Well, yes. As a matter of fact it is. Because there are consequences. There are always consequences. And the results of this plan of action are not always what you would wish them to be.

So now here I am, recognizing this, and realizing that I must change or I’m just going to be treading water for the rest of my life and probably end up selling pencils from a tin can on the street corner, telling everyone I meet about how I wrote a book once and I have five other books started and none of them are finished. That’s if I can get my massive body out of the house because I’ll weigh 800 pound from eating cheesecake at every meal.

Yeah. Change is necessary. Because there are consequences.

Damn it.

Honestly. It sucks to mature with age.