Category: Blogging and Social Media

  • The Search For A Blog Post

    Once Upon A Time, not so very long ago (this afternoon, in fact), there was a girl named Betsy who was sitting in front of her computer desperately seeking a blog post.

    Betsy strove mightily to put out a blog post at least once a week. But, alas, The Sickness had descended upon her and hit her and knocked her asunder for several weeks and so she flaileth.

    And, lo, The Sickness had been a mighty and terrible foe, but Betsy had at last fought it into a corner and was now struggling to pick up her life again.  Verily, she hath determined that she would in no way sink into a sea of snot and lethargy.

    However, despite flailing mightily, this afternoon Betsy could find no blog to post. She rifled through the dim recesses of her mind, and yet could not chase a blog post from the thickets. She searched the air, and could not see a blog post flying overhead. She searched the depths of the wine-dark sea, and saw many creatures, but no blog post. Or at least, not a blog post that was obvious and easy to catch.

    “Alas!” she cried, wrist to forehead, head flung back, “Whatever shall I do? If I do not have a blog post by this eve, I shall skip yet another week and will wake up in the morning feeling hatred towards myself and my poor uncreative mind!”

    “Thou must not hateth thyself when a blog post dost not come, for lo, many blog posts hath come before, and many more will come in the future. Another will appear. Sometimes that is just the way things goeth.”

    Startled, Betsy looked to her left and saw a large white rabbit dressed in the jaunty costume of a minstrel. His tri-cornered hat was decked with bells that jingled, and he was carrying a tambourine with ribbons upon it.

    “Good day, sir,” she said. “I know you, do I not?”

    “You do,” the rabbit affirmed. “For I am Sir Harold the Wise.”

    “Sir Harold?” Betsy frowned, her mind much confused. “Art thou not the Guide on my Quest to become a successful independent author?”

    “I art,” the rabbit nodded. “But just as Alice followed a White Rabbit to find Wonderland, I will also lead you to many strange places.”

    “You wilt?” Betsy clapped her hands together in glee. “And wilt thou help me to find a blog post for this eventide? For, lo, I have searched everywhere within my brain and without, but one does not appear. At least, not one that is obvious and easy to catch.”

    Sir Harold shook his tambourine. “T’would be my pleasure, my lady!”

    “Such awesomeness wouldst be much appreciated!”

    Together the two sat at the computer looking through files. Then they wandered into Betsy’s mind, as Sir Harold was much familiar with the landscape.  They searched the fields and woodlands. Finally, they dove into the deep lake at the center of Betsy’s mind to see what they could see.

    But, lo, although they saw many fine visions and ferocious creatures and a few things that really cannot be spoken of aloud, they did not see a blog post. Or at least they did not see a blog post obvious and easy to catch.

    At last, winded and burdened, they returned to the computer.

    “Alas, I see nary a blog post!” Betsy cried. “Whatever shall I do, Sir Harold? I must needs give up!”

    And Sir Harold raised a finger and looked exceedingly stern. “Just because a blog post is not obvious and easy to catch dost not mean it is not there. Thou must not quit. Quitters never win, and winners never quit.”

    Betsy pouted and crossed her arms. “So sayest thou.”

    “Indeed I do, my lady!” Sir Harold shook his tambourine again. “Dost thou have any thoughts at all? If so, please tell me what they are.”

    Betsy frowned. “Mayhap I should write about excuses and how I have so many of them? Or how I have anger, or, indeed, feelings of woe towards my own poor person? In truth, I have many feelings that I do not express.”

    “That I doubt, my lady.” Now Sir Harold shook his head, making the bells on his hat ring. “And, lo, thou didst just complain last week. More would be whining.”

    “True.” Betsy thought. “Mayhap I should write about my feline companions and the roundworms that do not go away?”

    “Nay, for I fear many will not care for such a subject.”

    “True.” Betsy thought and then snapped her fingers. “Ah hah!” she exclaimed.

    “What seest thou?” Sir Harold demanded.

    “I shall write about this adventure, my friend!” Betsy told him. “I shall write about my search for a blog post and how I did not find one, and how you came to help, and how we did not find one.”

    Sir Harold thought and nodded. “Mayhap t’would be best. But what will be the moral of the story? For even a lowly blog post must have some kind of a point.”

    Betsy smiled upon him and opened a blank page on her computer. “That even when you think you have not found something, oft times you have. It’s just that you do not know that you have found it and so you walk away.”

    “And that a blog post can be whatever you want it to be, even if it is, in the end, about nothing,” Sir Harold added.

    And Betsy doth smile.

    “Indeed, Sir Harold. Indeed.”

     

  • What’s Going On Here?

    Betsy bloggingSo, here’s the thing about blogging.  If you have a blog, you have to blog.  Because if you have a blog and you DON’T blog, it just looks stupid.  And if you have a blog and you blog, you have to have something about which to blog.  Because if you blog and you’re not saying anything of value, that looks stupid too.  Especially if you’re an author.  Like me.  Because we’re supposed to be creative and crap and be able to say things of value.

    I want to blog, I like to blog, but frankly sometimes it’s hard to pull a blog post out of my butt (and aren’t you glad to know that’s where my blog posts come from?)  About the only thing I do that’s exciting is writing.  The whole decision to self-publish is a pretty interesting topic too.  And I thought it would be cool to tell the story of my journey through the forest of self-publishing.  I wanted to talk about the things I’m going to learn and the challenges I’ll face.

    The problem is, there are about a hundred million gazillion people out there blogging about writing and publishing and most of them are WAAAYYYY more qualified than I am to write about that stuff.  Besides, I didn’t want to just write boring facts and opinions.  I really need to amuse myself.  After all, I’m the only person I know for sure is actually reading this thing.

    My dilemma was solved one day when I met this albino gerbil named Harry who told me he was my guide and he’d lead on my quest to write books and self-publish.  Then I realized my brain is full of voices all talking and arguing and trying to get me to make one decision or another, which is a little disturbing but helps a lot when I write dialogue.  And I realized the story I have to tell about my journey is full and rich and has heroes and villains.  And I realized that I already had a platform on which to tell my story because I had my blog.  And finally I realized that my blog didn’t have to be like other blogs with straight-up, traditional blog posts.  I am a storyteller.  Ergo, my blog can tell a story.

    So that’s what I’m doing – which you may have noticed if you’ve read the last few posts.  Some posts will be straight up like this one, but most of them will be part of my continuing story told in multiple voices.  There will be excitement and pathos and a wide and varied cast of characters.  Heck, I haven’t  met everyone yet, and they live in my mind!

    I guess this means my blog won’t be like other blogs.  But it should at least be somewhat entertaining.  I hope you join me for the ride.

    Computer Reading

     

     

     

  • Betsy Builds A Snowman…er…Blog Post

    hello, blogosphere
     
    Blogosphere?

    *silence*

    Blogosphere,  I know you’re there.  *touches door closed in her face*

    *crickets chirp*

    I had a good excuse for not blogging this time.  I did.  It was a very rough winter.

    *wind whistles through trees*

    I honestly didn’t have the time to blog.

    *echoes* blooog blooog blooog

    Blogosphere?  I really miss you.  *places hand flat on door’s wooden planks* *sings* Do you want to build a blog post?

    *door slams open*  Oh, no you didn’t!

    Blogosphere!  There you are!

    Tell me you didn’t just sing “do you want to build a blog post” in Kristen Bell’s voice to the tune of “Do You Want to Build A Snowman”, a well-loved song from the hit Disney movie Frozen, just so all of these keywords will be in this post and thus help your SEO and website discoverability!

    Um, no.  Uh, of course not. *eyes slide to the left*

    You did!  You totally did and now you’re PLAYING me.  

    Okay, yes!  Yes, I am!  Facebook is jerking me around by not sharing my posts. Twitter moves too fast, Google Plus doesn’t like me, and Pinterest is only interested in recipes.  You’re all I have left, Blogosphere, the only place where I mean anything at all because I own a dear wee little bit of you.  I NEED to use you. I’m SUPPOSED to use you. It’s what everyone says to do. A domain….my own domain…all I have….left.

    Oh, right.  So, tell me this then.  What are your plans this time around, huh?  I know how you roll now sister.  You’ve got nothing but a long trail of dreams and broken promises behind you.  You tell me you’ll make the commitment.  You tell me you’ll be here regularly.  Then I won’t hear from you for six months.  Do you know how your domain CRIED for you?  Do you know how it WEPT?

    I’m sorry!  I’m really sorry!  I just had a lot of things coming down around me and I couldn’t–

    And I’ll bet you’re thinking that your personal angst and drama broken by brief and pathetic attempts at humor are going to be enough to pique your audience’s interest and maintain their attention until you finally F*?!@%G get your book finished?

    Um….yes?

    Oh, for God’s….*heavy breathing*  Look.  If you’re serious about keeping things going this time–

    I am!  I am!

    –what do you want from it?  Huh?  What are you looking for?

    I–

    Don’t waste either of our times with excuses.  Don’t toy with your domain again!  While we’re here I could be off watching Miley Cyrus show her butt off while she twerks in a thong! Tell me what you want from this blog?

    I…I…I’m supposed–

    Forget supposed! Forget what everyone tells you what a blog is supposed to be. What do YOU really want? SPIT IT OUT!

    I…I…I want it to be FUN!

    Fun?

    Yes!  Fun!  I want my writing to be fun!  I want my blogging to be fun!  Since nobody’s reading anyway–

    Two people.

    –I can do whatever I want to do, right?

    It’s your hosting fee.

    Then I want it to be FUN! *crosses arms*  Take that!

    Hmmm.  Fun.

    For me!  Fun for me.  It can be all angsty and honest and revealing and crap, but has to be fun too! It has to be fun to write.

    Well–

    It has to be lively! *points to blog header*  Do you SEE that?  Lively!  Zesty!  Zany!  Screwball! Because that’s ME, goddammit!  ME! ME! ME!

    Okay, now you’re scaring me.

    *scream-sings*  DO YOU WANT TO BUILD A SNOWMAN…!!!!

    Okay, okay.  Jesus, shut up.  I get it already.

    Fun!  *fists clench*  *breath heaves*

    Fine. Fun. Sounds good.

    *blinks*  Really?

    Sure.  If you think it’s fun, you might actually keep doing it.

    Thank you.  *clears throat* *straightens t-shirt*

    Not like I pay much attention anyway.

    I’m just not sure how to make it…um…fun.

    How the hell would I know that?  You’ve got enough voices in your head.  Talk to some of them.

    Hmmm.  They ARE always talking to me anyway.  They might as well be useful.  *ponders*  Yes.  Yes, I think that’s a good idea.  I’ll talk to the Muse.  She’s been percolating.

    Wonderful.  Are we done here?  I have to go comment on nudity in Game of Thrones.

    Oh, yes.  Thank you, Blogosphere.  You’ve been very helpful.

    Well, I am the repository of knowledge and cat videos for this generation.

    *Blogosphere leaves the post*

    I feel so…energized!  Oh! Oh, I have to go plan!  *sings*  Let it go…..let it go……

    Betsy skips out of post.
     

    [tube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2hJYS6XNiw[/tube]

  • Blogging Is Sooooo Yesterday

    hello, blogosphereBlogosphere, I have a bone to pick with you.

    Why the heck would you want to pick bones? I don’t have any bones. All of my skeletons are in the closet.

    I mean, I’m feeling annoyed with you.

    Oh. *shrug* Okay. Why take it out on me? Just go flame someone on Facebook or Twitter.

    See? That’s what I mean. Facebook. Twitter. Not blogs. You never told me blogs were obsolete.

    Obsolete? What are you talking about?

    You’re not hip. You’re not with it.

    I am so hip, gosh darn it!

    You’re wearing paisley and wide lapels. Admit it!

    What’s wrong with wide lapels? And I see you’re still wearing your fuzzy purple go-go boots with the poofy tassels.

    I, uh, my feet were cold. ANYWAY, you never told me that you were dead.

    What? *pfft*  I’m not dead.

    You are too. It says so right here in this blog.

    Wait – a blog said blogs are dead?

    And the notes from the RWA conference say you’re a dinosaur.

    Yeah? Well, they might be the voice of romance, but they’re not the voice of me! I’m still mighty! I’m still powerful! *rwaaarrrr* Ow. Where did you put the medicated rub? I think I pulled something.

    Everyone’s gone mobile, Blogosphere. Everyone’s doing everything on their phones. They’re talking on their phones. They’re interacting on their phones. They’re playing games on their phones. Hell, they’re making COFFEE on their phones and then drinking it through an app! Then they’re using an app to brush their TEETH! And they have apps to drive them to work and play with their kids! Apps, apps, apps! Whatever the heck apps are, they got them!  Blogs are for the dogs! Apps are where it’s at!

    Well, why write a blog then, huh?  Huh?  If blogs are so dead, why are you wasting your time? Come on, answer that, why doncha?  

    Well, uh–

    Yeah, I’ve gone there.  Come on.  Come on, tell me!  TELL ME!

    BECAUSE I’VE GOT NOWHERE ELSE TO GO!

    Hey, nice “Officer and a Gentleman” reference.

    Thanks. But it’s true. I started writing a blog because I couldn’t afford a web designer and WordPress is free.

    Free?

    Free.

    I feel so…used.

    You should. I think that’s why most people write blogs.

    *sniff*

    Blogosphere, are you…crying?

    No. *word trembles with wet pain*

    You ARE crying.

    *silence broken only by Blogosphere’s muffled sobs*

    Blogosphere, I had no idea I could hurt you this way. I didn’t know you cared.

    I don’t… *sniffle*… care.

    I’m sorry. I…I just don’t know what to say.

    I’m not dead.

    Of course not.

    I’m still mighty and *sniff* powerful.

    Of course you are.

    Do you still love me?

    Sure.  And I still can’t afford a web designer.

    Okay.

     

    Betsy blogging

  • Always Connected

    connectmeThanks to the unexpected and brutal death of my main computer, I find myself the proud owner of a spanking new laptop.  Don’t worry – I didn’t lose any files.  Back up, people!  Back up!  STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND BACK UP YOUR FILES NOW!

    Erm, sorry.  Anyway, because I have a new computer for the first time in four years, I’ve been introduced to the wacky and wonderful world of Windows 8.  This post will not be about Windows 8, but let me just say that Windows 8 makes me nostalgic for Vista, and I didn’t think that was possible.

    What I’ve found the most interesting about setting up a new computer is the bland assumption that everyone will be connected to the Internet at all times.  And, perhaps more importantly, the assumption that people WANT to be connected at all times.  The whole system, and most of the supporting software, is designed with one goal in mind – connectivity.

    Based on my observations, this is a pretty fair assumption.  Most people of my acquaintance have smart phones or tablets and, according to research I’ve read, computer use is switching to mobile devices in a big way.   That, combined with the new cloud-based thingees out there means everyone can indeed be connected all the time.  You can have your music all the time.  You can play your games all the time.  You can access your files all the time.  You can be on your social media networks all the time.  You can text or actually make phone calls all the time.  You can reach out and touch somebody’s hand ALL THE TIME.

    But….

    There’s a price for everything and it seems to me that there’s a steep one for all of this connectivity.  Because we are always connected, we are expected to – and indeed required to – always face outwards.  We are always supposed to be available.  Always supposed to be ready for mental company.  Always ready to interact.

    If people can always reach you, can you have a room in your own mind that’s just for you?  If’ we’re always connected to the hive, are we able to have our own private mental space as well?  Our own personal dance space?

    And if we don’t have our own space, where is our freedom to just be ourselves?  If we’re always “on”, when do we have the time to think?  To be who we are?  To create?

    Or is it the fact that we’re afraid to be who we are that makes all of this immediate connection so very tempting?  How often have you sat down at your computer to do something constructive only to find that the Internet has sucked away hours of your life without you even noticing?

    I don’t know the answers.  I just know that I need to turn off my router if I want to get anything done.  And I’m kind of glad I don’t get cell phone coverage at the Palatial Horvath Estate.

    And I hope I figure out Windows 8 soon because I’m getting some pretty big bald spots from yanking out all of my hair.

    Guess it’s a good thing I don’t have Instagram.

    buildingabridge

     

  • 10 Bad Things About Blogging

    hello, blogosphereHello, Blogosphere.

    Hey.

    Did you know tomorrow is our two year anniversary?

    Sure.

    Do you care?

    No.

    What if I told you I didn’t want to blog anymore?

    Please.  You won’t stop.  You were practically pooping sunbeams and rainbows in your last post.

    I was not!

    Yeah, you were.  Then there’s the fact you have candles lit and Barry White playing right now.

    Shows what you know.  That’s Al Jarreau.

    Whatevs.  You love me, babe.  Admit it.  You’ll never leave me.

    Oh, don’t you be so sure, mister fancy-pants Blogosphere.  You’re not always a box of chocolate, you know.  I was just trying to put a good spin on things in the last post.

    Yeah?  Prove it.

    Prove what?

    You say I have issues?  Prove it.  Hit me with your best shot.  Fire away.

    God.  Pat Benatar.  Okay, then.  Here are 10 bad things about blogging.

    Only ten?

    And just remember that you asked for it. *clears throat*

    1.  Blogging takes time.

    Blogging takes time I could be using for, oh, writing.

    As if.

    2. It sucks up creativity

    A lot of times I’m spending my creative juices on the blog, not on other things.

    You have creative juices? Gross.  I’m not sure I wanted to know that.

    3. You have to think of things to say

    Sometimes the hardest part about writing a blog is just thinking of interesting things to say.

    Let me know when you figure that one out. Badda bing! *rimshot!*

    4. It’s work

    Blogging might be enjoyable sometimes, but it can also be a bit of a grind

    Waaa-waaa-waaaa See this? This is a little violin playing just for you. Cry me a river, babe.

    5. You have to hit deadlines

    I keep feeling like I can’t stop, like I have to keep going, keep hitting those deadlines.

    I don’t care if you hit deadlines. I barely know if you post.

    6. Yeah, and that’s another thing – it’s easy to get lost in the shuffle

    Here you go to all of this effort, and nobody even sees it.

    As long as you know where you stand.

    7. You must open yourself

    You are opening yourself up to the world at large. You never know who’s going to see it.

    And you never know who will tell your mother.

    Exactly!

    8. There are misunderstandings

    It’s inevitable that some readers will misunderstand what you’ve written. And, because you tend to be writing about yourself and/or your opinions, it can feel kind of personal.

    Which is a problem only if people actually read the post. See? I’m doing you a favor.

    9. You can get more invested the blog than you should be.

    Your personal investment should be in your, well, life. But the blog can become an incredibly huge sucking black-hole.

    Which is just the way it should be. Ah, power. I love it.

    10. The Internet is forever

    Nothing dies in cyberspace. You never know when something you’ve written will raise its head to say hello.

    It’s true. I rotate, silent and eternal and then, when you least expect it – badda bing!

    And someone tells my mother.

    Exactly.

    Oh, well. You’re right Blogosphere. Even though we have our issues, you are the wind beneath my wings. I just can’t be quit of you. You are my sunshine, my only—

    Stop!

    Happy anniversary, Blogosphere! May we have another fruitful year together.

    Kill me now.

    No. I think I’d rather eat cake.

    You always want to eat cake.

    Yes. Yes, I do.

     mmmm...cake